Stupidity in Public....and getting away with it

There is a FANTASTIC advantage to being a drama student.

My Nature of Theatre class raided the student centre commons, and all in one fell swoop we froze in place, doing our own thing. People reacted in so many different ways, between freaking out, laughing, throwing paper at the friends of theirs that were frozen in place, and poking the frozen kids.

It was an exercise like that that makes this programme so damn awesome, to me. Because yes, science is cool. In fact, I think it's badass. But it's not for everyone. And all of the science students that are my friends think that me doing what I'm doing is equally hard, because of the amount of reading, physical work, and intuitive thinking that needs to be done.

Also, so many darn papers.

But still, learning about Dramatic Art is a wicked cool thing, because it's almost like it's a part of the framework for life itself.

One of the nifty things that the exercise did was make people think about what was going on in their own lives, because suddenly as they're all moving here are these kids that are stopped right in the middle of the room.

I guess basically what I'm trying to say is that Dramatic Art is useful on more than just an entertainment level. It can also affect people psychologically, philosophically, and even physically. Think about it.

Peace, Love, and MarioKart
~Dexie

Returning to Productivity

I deleted my facebook account last night.

I decided that the site does me more harm than good, because I find myself spying on people that I haven't spoken to in years, just so I can find out what's been going on in their life.

That's just creepy. So I'm stopping myself.

Not only that, I realised that the damn site just causes more drama than I can handle in my life right now, so I'm quitting while I'm ahead so that I don't end up making my life worse.

Getting rid of my facebook account was the first step I decided to make in trying to make my life better, and sort of ease the pressure of social networking from me while I recover from things I need to recover from. That way, I can just quiet down, talk to the people who help me the most, and stop worrying about other people's feelings about me.

That, and if I want to get a job they can't invade that privacy, because it no longer exists.

Furthermore, I couldn't help but laugh hysterically at how desperately Facebook clings to people. When I went to deactivate my account, the website shot straight for my guilt complex and asked "Are you sure you want to leave? All your friends will miss you." And proceeded to list 4 or 5 people's names followed by "will miss you."

Then, there's a list of reasons why you're leaving facebook that you can choose from.

Each and every single one has a pitiful response in order to attempt to keep you here.

Fucking.hilarious.

Suffice it to say, I want to keep quiet and lay low for a while, and getting rid of 155 people's ability to spy on me is probably one of the best steps to take first.

Power to anyone else who gives up that ghost with me.

Peace, Love, and MarioKart

~Dexie

Anonymity and Psychological Catastrophe

One of my best friends gets bombarded daily with e-mails containing photos of her biggest and most irrational phobia. All because of mysterygoogle.com.

Basically, someone who knows her, or some people who know her, thought it would be funny to post her e-mail address on mysterygoogle.com asking for pictures of puppets. Most people who respond to this "Mission" from Mystery Google think it's harmless fun, because they probably have no idea how much it hurts, scares, and harms her. The person who started the mission, however, was well aware; it's not like a phobia like hers is common to people.

So, I would love to know who the fuck did that.

Obviously, you know her. Obviously, you know what she goes through when the word 'puppet' is even said in conversation. By that notion, you also know a bit about her background, where she's come from, and what she's gone through.

Some kind of 'friend' you are.

Whoever you are, you don't have to see her curled up, shaking with fear as she tries desperately to get images out of her head and bring herself back to what society calls 'normal'. You don't have to be there, wondering if she's actually going to want to wake up the next morning, because she's so scared of seeing the images again at night. You're not the one that runs to her computer and deletes the messages in her inbox before she makes the mistake of opening them.

You're an inconsiderate asshole. Or if there's more of you, you're a compilation of inconsiderate assholes. And you're a stain on where we are, where she is, and where you come from. You think you're so fucking brave, hiding behind your mask of anonymity. Thinking that the Mysterious Mystery Google will protect you.

Just makes you a set of cowards and mindless drones the likes of which I haven't seen outside of *chan fora. So have fun, knowing that you've either started, or followed an order from someone you don't know, don't care about, and are destroying the happiness of someone who has her own life to deal with. Your catharsis should not be her pain.

Sleep with that under your pillow, kiddies.

~Dexie

The Ethics of Academia

Being a full-time university student is ridiculously stressful. And that's on its own. Then there's the added familial pressure that some of us feel when we're expected to find a job so we can pay our own way through a system that costs more (in the immediate sense) than a whole year's worth of bills.

I tried working when I went back to school this September. I had about 14 hours a week at the gas station near my house. On top of that, I was also in a community theatre production. The theatre production had been made a commitment before the job. On top of that, because I'm studying theatre in school, it just makes more sense that I'd prioritise something coinciding with my education over a job that has little to no security, promotion ladder, or pay raise.

I do not regret at all telling my family that while I was in school, I could not, and would not, work. To the outsider, or infamous "other", studying drama in university is just a fluff and puff program for easy A's and a pretty certificate after four years.

Totally not true.

I just started the Drama and Communications program at my school. The classes, while they're easy for me, would definitely not be easy for anyone else in my family. It's a lot of physical work, mental work, and social interaction that depends on each of its parts to function completely. 5 classes is 15 hours a week of lecture. Add the daily readings, and assignments to do outside of class, you have an extra 30 or so hours to work on just your education alone.

That's a full-time job. Which will eventually get me another full-time job.

My professors have said that working more than 10 hours a week while in school at this rate is remarkable. And as far as I know, there are very very VERY few people who can do that.

I am one of the not-so-few. And I have to say, I'm really proud of myself.

Putting my education first is one of the first steps I've taken to ensuring that I can make the best of my learning, and pursue my graduate studies.

So to any other post-secondary students out there (college, university), if you're not working while you're in school, don't sweat it. If you stick through your education and get superstar grades, it means a hell of a lot more than a part-time job and all C's. Student loans are there for a reason.

~Dexie

Your Alternative News Source? Fuck that.

There's an underground buzz happening that says blogs are the new-and-improved, more accurate, less media-biased source for news in the new age.

Know what I think? It's bullshit.

Blogs can be about current events, sure. But allow me to point out the flaws in this system, that are just as pertinent as those pertaining to the media, yet largely overlooked.

Firstly, you've got the spectrum of crazy-hardcore-conservative to people who are so left wing they're coming back around to the right. Sure, they don't have the media bias per se, but they sure as hell have their own two cents about the issue, because if they didn't, it'd be pretty useless to talk about it.

Secondly, where did they first hear about this issue? Mr. Holmes, you've found a clue! If they have an opinion on the matter, and they weren't there first, they clearly got the idea from somewhere. Even this post is inspired by something I read somewhere else. That original source, which, for all intents and purposes, we will call a primary source, is the basis of the secondary blog post, meaning anything they gleaned from the accounts of a news reporter/journalist/scrapbook/photo album of the person who discovered this before.

Is it taking away from the news media? Nope. If anything, it's probably helping bolster news media events. If you consider that a blog entry can be a response to an article in a newspaper, for instance, the tech-savvy blogger can very easily link to the news report they got their information from. Lo and behold, someone would likely be interested in reading the 'original' material, click, read, boom. Another reader. The same can be done with televised news stories, I'm sure; YouTube and the wonders of 'free' information. By having an opinion, a blogger is helping boost the reader/viewership of news, because most intelligent people won't just take the blogger's opinion for salt. Then, and only then, can you have discourse in the blogosphere.

Long story short, blogs don't really give you anything more than a reiteration of news stories from somewhere else with an added bonus of some nameless Joe's two cents on the matter. Think of it as a more rapid, uncensored version of your basic Letters to the Editor. In the end, that's just what it is.

Peace, Love, and MarioKart
~Poindextra

RCN 18186-H

I keep you close to my heart, always.

It's not the same without you, and it never will be. Words cannot describe how much I miss having you in my life, through the good times and the bad. You were always there for me, no matter what you had going on. You never criticised my tears, or called me names, or put me down.

Your humour was your way of showing how much I meant to you. And my retorts were my way of saying I wanted to grow up to be the person you became as my grandfather.

You never denied me the affection and love I didn't get from my father. You never denied me your attention when I needed it. You taught me about yourself, and about what goes on in my own head.

You loved me every day, didn't you? I know I love you, even though we're not together in the same lifetime. But one day, we'll meet again. And I'll run to your arms as fast as I can, and be the happiest little girl in the universe again.

You're still the centre of my world. And I can only hope that you're proud of anything I strive to do, and I know that when I'm down, you're holding my hand and whispering to me that I'll be okay. All I need is time.

I'll never forget you. I promise.

~Sam.

Existential Apathy

I get rattled by conversations involving politics. Not sure why.

Something about the gross...intellectual decomposition caused by politics bugs me. What's worse, is it's not even the politicians I can't stand anymore. It's the mouths of the voters that piss me off.

Think about it. You get your basic angry working-class Joe, who listens to the news making negative spin after negative spin on ye olde politician. And all this little Joe will do is bitch and moan over how terrible the world is growing to be. And after someone says "Why don't you do something about it?" they're met with the redundant response;

There's nothing I can do about it.

It sure as hell feels like there isn't, but I will admit that if someone out there is willing enough, and brass-balled enough to step in front of a mass media source and scream "This world is going to shit, and it's your fault because you're lazy," I'll be right behind them. Fuck, I'd do it myself if I knew where to start.

Maybe I should.

People need to suck up their inadequacies and start thinking about the world around them. Pull the stick out of your ass, and the gauze out of your ears, and listen to your surroundings. Listen to what other people think.

It's damn hard to do, I'm well aware. But it's not a matter of changing the world in a day. Never was. Just make little changes here and there, and watch as the little steps grow into big results. But before any of that can be done, the quintessential foundation needs to be laid;

Pay attention.

There's nothing you can do well with false or incomplete information. And this is the biggest problem being faced today. People will look no further than the information they want to hear, information that validates their opinion and makes them seem smart in the eyes of someone else, if only for that brief stint of a coffee-shop conversation.

Hypocrisy blooms constantly in this day and age. Promises made that will likely never be kept, ideas that are only half-founded and then promptly contradicted or reversed for fear of persecution, and ignorant fools sitting behind the television taking every word anyone says at face value. The metaphor is losing its flair in favour of literalist interpretations. Nobody wants to think for themselves anymore.

This is not the freedom the dead soldiers fought for. This is not the world the Renaissance scholars strived to create.

This is the world where the biota has become robotic. Pre-programmed opinions governed by corporate labels and anger/scare tactics, controlled by the minds everyone's mad at, but too afraid to push against. The human mind is a beautiful thing, and it's being fashioned into little more than it's own egocentric universe.

Sure, we still question everything. But does it count as questioning if it's never going to be heard?

Peace, Love, and MarioKart.
~Poindextra